I'm sorry
by felismiles
Summary: sad fruk fanific
1. Chapter 1

Ciao~ This is a fruk fanfic from arthurs pov(human names used!). Arthur cuts because of the pain Francis causes him. I hope you enjoy it. If you do, please leave a review.

DONT LIKE DONT READ!

This is for my gf. She sticks by my side even though she shouldn't and i make a lot of mistakes :3 Thank you, sugar plum~ 3

I'm sorry, Kaylin...

* * *

Arthur had had enough. His boyfriend was ignoring him; he couldn't stop thinking of his past; his career as an author was not going well; his country was a mess and his citizens were "teaching him lessons"; his experiences were changing him; he had been raped; his boyfriend was a suicidal cutter, just like him; and the list could go on. Arthur just wanted to end it all.

Arthur went and got some ale. He chugged it down, and then broke the glass bottle. He cut. Light cuts, deep cuts, simple scratches, cuts that drew a great deal of blood. Anything to make him feel pain. And he does. He feels pain all over and he loves it.

Francis, his boyfriend who had already broken his heart once before, was how he picked up the habit. It hurt him knowing the man he loved didn't love himself. The fact that Francis found it necessary to cut and that he thought he wasn't needed tore Arthur apart.

Arthur knew he shouldn't cut. He was extremely low on blood and his heart was not large enough to support him, so the doctors saw it as a miracle that he was alive. But he needed to cut. He failed as Francis' lover and didn't deserve to live. Francis felt pain, and he would feel pain too.

And he liked it. He almost loved it more than he loved Francis.

"A-angleterre? Is that you?" Francis stepped out of the shadows of Arthur's living room. "W-what are you doing?! Y-you've been cutting, haven't you? Arthur, you need to stop!"

Arthur looked at Francis coldly and replied icily, "Are you saying you don't cut?" Arthur drove the glass further into his skin, causing a large amount of blood to spill. "You do, don't you? You promised though… You promised when I first figured out that you would stop. You make so many promises. Like how you said that you would never break my heart again, that you would never hurt me." Tears began to fall from Arthur's face. Francis had broken his heart when he said that he no longer loved him. It was like a stab that left pain which would never go away. Just because he changed. The always smiling and laughing Arthur he knew had changed into this. His kindness turned into hate, his pureness into evil.

Francis thought that by staying with Arthur, he wouldn't be hurting him. He would do this even if he had to hurt himself. However, he still hurt Arthur. Every time they meet or talked Arthur would end up with more stabs.

Francis didn't want to admit that he only liked Arthur as a friend and decided to keep going with their relationship, hurting or not.

"I'm not dealing with this, Arthur."**_Stab_**

"The plum may be strong, big, and beautiful, but you can't go around acting as a one man army. They don't last long."

"I don't care…" **_stab_**

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be…"

"I am… I changed so much but I still love you." **_Stab_**

"I'm the one who lost the feelings…" **_stab stab_**

"Francis, I gave you a second chance. Can you give me one?..."

"I like you…I just don't love you anymore." **_Stab stab stab_**

"Like like or just a friend?"

"I don't know…" **_stab_**

"Do you think you could ever love me again?"

"I don't know…" **_stab_**

"I tried…" Arthur sighed and smiled softly. He got up even though his thighs hurt from all the open cuts and he was still bleeding. He opened his mouth and began to sing.

"Look into my eyes

Can you see what is inside?

They are filled with looooove

For yoooooou~

For you

However, when you look at me your eyes are so cold

It's not as you told

'cause I no longer am who I was

And now you've had enough

I just wanna press rewind

Turn back time

Back to when you loved me and I loved you

I wanna press rewind

Turn back time

Start again

With yoooooou~

With you

Look into my eyes

Can you see what is inside?

They are filled with looooove

For yoooooou~

For you"

Arthur closed his eyes muttering, "I love you… I'm sorry…"

He stopped breathing.


	2. Chapter 2

Blood.

It was all over the place. England had lost so much. But he couldn't help but cut. He couldn't stop himself. No doctors, no friends, not his love, not Francis his past lover, not anyone could persuade him to stop.

Arthur would cut, like he always will. It was a fact that he had accepted into his life. As sad as this may seem, he didnt care. But he didnt want to be a burden. He had fallen in love with someone after Francis.

He broke up with Francis after being able to leave the hospital. Francis had come that afternoon to pick him up. "Things aren't working out between us, and you dont like me. This is for the best." He stood up and left Francis there.

Arthur fell for someone else quickly. He would sigh when he thought about it. _I sure did move on fast. _

As stated earlier, he didn't want to be a burden. He didnt want to bother his new-found love. But he knew that that was destinied to happen. _I always bother others. ALWAYS. _So he cut to releive his pain that had been jumbled up inside of him since his childhood. He had had a childhood friend that left him after a series of arguements and fights.

The only person he ever told was his new love.

Arthur found a bottle of ale and took a long swig. He finished it quickly and broke the bottle. He didnt always have to drink because the roads where usually filled with beer and ale bottles. He would take one of those, break it, and cut. Somedays, like today, he wouldn't find any. So he would resort to drinking.

He didn't want to be a burden. He didnt want to bother everyone.

And he did what he had too.

He cut.


End file.
